The Swarm

I missed that feeling. That unmistakeable flurry of butterflies that fills my belly with just the thought of toeing the start line again. It happens at any time, anywhere, no matter, just as long as I think about the upcoming race and my apprehension at running fast and far. It hit me today, merely an hour after completing my registration online, as I rode my bike down to the Y to get ready for my easy 10 miler. I simply thought about the race Saturday and, bam, my stomach was all aflutter.

Yes, Saturday. My coach proposed the race to me a week ago as I continued to run out of the injury and my workouts started to show improvement. I told him I wanted to hold off until after Saturday’s long run workout to see how that and the subsequent recovery went. Well, it went good enough as I signed up for the race today.

I’m not as confident as I would normally be in signing up for a race, but it’s been too long since I last put it all on the line, which was before the recent injury put me down. So I’m doing this race just to get my head back in the competitive game and get a little taste of that fire.

The race is a 15k trail race, the last in a series, on a course I have never run before, which will only add to the excitement of it all. As I’ve run this series before, I expect this to be a pretty brutal course and my body should receive a pretty significant thrashing. All part of the fun though, right?

I’m not placing any definitive expectations on my effort at this point, as I’m just not race confident and unsure what to expect from my legs or lungs in a competitive environment. Sure, I’ll go out hard, but I have no idea if I’ll be able to keep pushing or hold on if necessary, but I’ll find out! I only hope to put in a good effort and get in a solid 15k hill workout on a mild (upper 40’s?! Come on!!) and camaraderie-filled Saturday morning. Count on a race report…and probably a reignited fire that will have me scouring the local race calendars for another go at attacking my decaying list of PR’s.

And butterflies. Of course, more butterflies.


5 responses to “The Swarm

  1. My feelings on the start line are a bit different and some of my rivals feel the same. It goes something like this: Why do we do this again? This is crazy! Why are we paying money to torture ourselves. But then when it is all over we realize that we chased or were chased and somehow survived and now we feel much better than if we had not come at all. Smiles the rest of the day whether winning or losing. Glad to survive!

    • I won’t say some of those ideas don’t cross my mind too! But agreed, if we make it to the finish line without broken legs…it’s always worth it.

  2. I love the butterfly feeling. I have a big race this weekend I feel the exact same way right now. I’m actually recovering from being sick, so I am really not sure how the whole thing will play out, but that’s what makes the whole thing one big adventure!

    • Sick or not, we never know how it’s going to play out, and yes, that’s what makes it so exciting! Also, if I DON’T have butterflies, then I’m way too comfortable and something isn’t right. Good luck on your race!

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