I’m back from vacation! Wait..that didn’t come out right. Let me try that again.
I’m back…..from….(hangs head dejectedly) vacation. Oh hell.
There, that’s more fitting. Actually, all isn’t that bad. I know I have a couple stories to post from the past week for this blog, but this time I want to post about something that came to me towards the end of the ride home today.
This past week really was great on so many levels. I got in some great rest, some great runs, made the most of every joyous second with my son (who is just stunningly amazing), and had enough downtime to really think some things through. Coming home from the trip today I realized I had a renewed sense of focus in relation to both my interests in and out of running, which is a motivation I haven’t had in awhile. When I was laid off last winter I found myself desperately pulled in so many different directions, whether that was seeing if I could develop my graphic design skills to a freelance endeavor, or just stepping it up in my running due to all the free time that uninvitingly popped up. Suddenly I found myself somewhat overwhelmed with effort and failure, and I dropped a handful of activities while just trying to stabilize my mental state. I couldn’t trust any of my motivations at the time and felt it best to scale back on everything I didn’t have utmost confidence in. Running, was the one thing I held on to, and it really helped me from going off the deep end.
So anyways, this week I decided to slowly involve myself back into some of the interests I pushed aside last winter and during today’s drive I found myself quite excited about getting to work on a few projects, or at least setting aside time to continue my old habits. I then found myself wondering why all this has popped up again, which I knew was somehow connected to the vacation, but I wasn’t exactly sure how. Then I realized just how much thinking time I had this past week. There were those precious hours on the beach where we could just sit there (or chase Noah around) that I had nothing to do but think. There were those same thinking hours back at the house while Noah napped. There were more than I ever wanted of those hours while driving through the night out to and up the east coast. I basically had a lot of dreaming time, which I realize I’ve been deprived of a lot lately. Before August (my son) came around, I spent so much time just reading, sitting and contemplating, at coffee shops and wherever, but since August (S.A.?) it really feels like I’ve been going non-stop in one way or another. This week made me realize just how important dream time is to one’s activities in life.
I realized just how important dream time was to my political perspectives and the active push for my own personal utopia. I realized just how important it was to really acting on some of the ideas that came to me years back (which most failed or never started, but that’s not the point). I also realized just how important it has been to my running and where I’ve been taking this.
Interestingly enough, I haven’t felt like I’ve deprived myself of dream time in relation to running and for a very obvious reason….I have plenty of dream time WHILE running, and considering how much mental effort it takes to actually perform the act of running fast, it only follows that my dream time will be focused on running alone. Sure, my mind wanders to other things from time to time, but I’m most often focused on how I can progress my performances and what other opportunities might open through all of this. That sort of mental time really shows in how much effort and relative success I’ve had with running. Although it comes down to putting one foot in front of the other (rather quickly), it starts with a good chunk of mental space….and a very important chunk of mental space.
And of course it follows, a lack of that mental focus results in a lack of action. It’s not always easy to find that time to dream when our lives are filled with either so many necessities or distractions. Most of us are not fortunate enough to run for a living, wherein our entire day is set aside for time to dream about running (while actually running). The rest of us work 8 hours a day, have kids, have financial stresses, have blogs (!)/facebook/myspace/texting/twittering, and so much more. Very quickly our time, both physical and mental, is consumed by “getting by” or “getting distracted”.
The goal then, is to find the space in our days for space in our heads, whether that is for new utopias or new PR’s. Success in that endeavor is always an increased quality of life, without a doubt. Speaking of, I need to get off this computer and get back to that space in my head before all this potential gets sucked away by the old daily routine. Fear not though…the posts will continue.
This past week….on and off. Some discouraging, some amazing.
It was vacation made up of lots of road trips. Don’t ask.